Different seasons in our lives reap different blessings (and different work!) … so why is it I find I am constantly trying to attain what others can, and are doing in their different season of life?
From the moment I married, from the moment I had our first child- all the way to our 5th, I am still doing the same thing! I’m constantly in a battle with my thoughts- I am not doing enough, or where I should be. When we first married and had our firstborn for example, the people I knew that had children the same age as ours were 10 years+ my senior and married even longer. Yet that did not penetrate into my rationalizing of where we should be. I was striving to be where they were in a few meager months that had taken them a decade to build. I eventually figured it out after awhile, although I have found it creeping up again as we are in the 10+ years of marriage/children stage of life. This time though, it looks very different.
I find myself reading blogs and Pinterest posts on how to stay ahead of the game and keep the house neat and tidy with a rotating schedule and de-cluttering systems. Even I, have written on these subjects! They. never. work. for. long. … in our house anyway during this season of our lives. I keep feeling like I have utterly failed as a mother and homemaker when comparing my state of home and children to another. Oh, I know better. When I look at the big picture that is, sometimes however- I can get so darned tunnel visioned! Seasons. Its all about the seasons. I am opening my eyes to the truth that even if others have children the exact same age or a tad older/younger, less or more- we can be in two very different seasons of life. There are too many varying factors to have any one family be in the same season as another. Once in awhile we meet in the middle at the same time just to have a factor change course, and yet again- different seasons. Our three year old twins are very dependent upon me compared to our first two children, then there is our third child who is smack dab in the middle, along with a husband who works very long hours with no holidays.
I somehow have been wrapped up in the mantra that the kids are all old enough- I should have a spotless house and weekly meal plan running smoothly. Please, I know your silently balking at me- I am balking at the lunacy of it as well. It sounded so realistic in my thoughts until I tried (and tried again) putting those ideas into practice, along with failing (and feeling) miserable in the process.
I suppose no one ever tried to shovel snow in the heat of an August summer day, or harvest their garden mid February- that would be absurd! However here I was trying to attain something that was not in season.
At the beginning of this post I mentioned the different blessings we reap in the seasons of our lives. There are always more blessings than drudgery. The trick is focusing my thoughts on the blessings and tuning in to where I am in the here and now. I am trying that, today. Verbalizing my many blessings helps. Looking at my life and family around me with a fresh and new perspective also is key. I may have scuffed walls, dirty floors and painted toe nails on the dog- but one thing is certain, I receive many hugs and kisses and cuddles throughout the day. I have snuggles with my children periodically morning through night, where we curl up in the rocking chair and just sit, or read a story. The first person my children want at their side when they get hurt or have a problem is me, their mom (unless dad walks through the door!) I am blessed to have a husband who supports a wife and children so I, their mother can raise them and school them. … I just need to keep following down the path we are on and enjoy the messy season of life we are in. Anyone who would like to judge me can either come over and change what they don’t like or we can come their way to play and mess their house up instead 🙂
I hope you have found some encouragement in my thoughts and challenges I have shared here today in my post. I know everyone else’s life can look a little more rose-y than our own at times and hope my experiences may resonate with you in some small way. Wishing you many blessings to your weekend!
3 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
9 What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?